Sexual Fantasies

Do you believe that the brain is the largest sex organ?

A full desire translated into an imaginary act can actually result to an orgasmic feeling. During sexual intercourse or daydreaming, we sometimes imagine romantic scenes which arouse us.

Fantasies can also "turn off” undesirable factors that affect the act. For instance, a woman can fantasize to keep herself from thinking about her bodily imperfections and odors; some guys, on the other hand, entertain non-sexual thoughts to avoid premature ejaculation.

Sexual fantasies are helpful. They can serve as an outlet for real-life restraints, and can help you plan future sexual encounters. In daydreaming, you can assume any role you never had. You can play the powerful one or the victim who enjoys being a slave; you can also imagine having multiple partners. It is sad that sexual fantasies have taboo status, and that’s why it becomes private; it remains repressed and never enacted in real life.

Sexual fantasies can be simple or out of this world. A number of people resort to fantasizing a simple walk in the park, while others linger on BDSM: Bondage and Discipline(B/D), Dominance and Submission(D/S), and Sadism and Masochism (S/M). For BDSM, the fundamental principle is voluntarily giving up control.

Half the male population finds being restrained from pleasure erotic. So in their fantasy, they want to be chained or cuffed while the woman is pumping on top. On the other hand, females have a penchant for the rape fantasy. Women tend to fantasize about being forced to surrender or becoming overpowered, but not being hurt. While reading this, you might say that this fantasy is overboard. But believe me when I tell you that these activities, be it just a daydream or reality, involve a great deal of responsibility. If you desire this, you are not weird or deviant but just adventurous. Just remember that BDSM involves an “SSC principle" (Safe, Sane, and Consensual).

Common fantasies are those that we can openly talk to our friends and partner about. In general, both sexes fancy reliving their most erotic sexual experience. It can be with their current partner, or while imagining having sex with a different partner. Women think of having sex in romantic locations, she in the irresistible lead role. Men daydream about having sexual power over multiple sex partners.

Whatever your fantasies are, it would be wise to share it with your partner. It will bring you closer and help you gain more intimacy and trust. It would be better for your man to involve you in his fantasies than achieve it through your best friend. You wouldn’t want him uttering another name while you're doing it, right?

Are you a sex addict?

Or is your partner a sex addict? I have heard some women complain that their husbands just can’t get enough, to the point that their vagina already gets swollen. Which leaves me wondering if these guys might be sex addicts.

Sexual addiction is the uncontrollable urge to engage in sexual activity. It can be with a partner or through viewing pornography, masturbation, visiting CSWs (commercial sex workers), among other sexual activities. Some people are not aware that they are sex addicts because their lifestyle is not affected glaringly; yet addiction can affect the productivity and relationships of some.

The dynamics of sexual addiction which is similar to one’s dependence on alcohol or illegal drugs. During sex, the body releases a powerful concoction of chemical substances that cause euphoria. The body gets used to these chemicals, similar to what happens with any other addictive substances, and the person ends up craving for more to consistently achieve the same effect. As a result, he or she will engage in any sexual activity no matter what it takes.

Sex addicts have high and low points. Sometimes they are elated, sometimes they are melancholic. They could also feel remorse, regret, anxiety, and isolation. Unfortunately, these people feel helpless and unable to change, and they believe that sex is their only escape.

How do you know if you or your partner is a sex addict? Go over this checklist of characteristics:

* Unable to decrease sexual activity in spite of knowing the consequences.
* Neglects important social, occupational, or recreational activities in favor of sexual behavior.
* Spends too much time and money planning and engaging in sexual activities.
* Suffers from intense mood swings when sexual desires are unfulfilled.
* Uses sexual fantasies or activities as a way of coping with stressful situations.

The first step to treating sexual addiction is acknowledging that you are indeed addicted. You have to accept that this disruptive behavior affects your everyday life. No one can recuperate from a problem without first acknowledging it and taking full responsibility for the recovery. Seek the help of professionals because they understand the situation better and can help you take specific steps toward a healthier sexual lifestyle.

If you suspect that your partner is a sex addict, talk to him. Get a specialist to help him deal with the actual addiction. A counselor can also help you go through challenges as a couple while he is undergoing treatment. It may be painful for both of you, but remember that sexual addiction will have longstanding effects if it remains unchecked.

The not so romantic facts about love

When we talk about relationships, we associate it with romance, making love, and friendship. But you must also know that the least romantic aspects of a relationship have the most to teach about yourself, your partner, and love in general.

Here are some realities.

You’ll work harder than you ever imagined. Relationships come with major responsibilities. They grow and evolve; thus, everyday is a learning experience. Learning is sometimes painful, but it will make you stronger. Relationships are not always a bed of roses. Don’t easily give up; efforts give endless rewards.

You will sometimes go to bed angry (and wake up angrier). There are some fights that stubbornly refuse to abate by bedtime—which is not an absolute deadline for fights. When you are still mad, you can sleep on it because you need to calm down. Maybe the next morning, you have gained a new perspective. It is also possible that the next morning, you will still be upset and reignite the fight. This can work positively, as it exhausts all the negative feelings; whereas you may kiss and make up before sleeping but repress wounded feelings.

There are sexless periods. This is normal especially when sleep becomes more important than sex. It is not an absolute sign that something is wrong; it’s just that sometimes, mojo is dormant. However, if the sexless period lasts more than a month, you might want talk to your partner or try sexual adventures.

Compromise is better than “I am right.” People tend to feel good when they know that they are right. Yet arguments are prolonged because each party claims she or he is right. This should not be the case because the more you insist you are right, the more discontented your partner will be. So instead of disagreements, why not have more patience and learn the value of compromise?

Conflict means we are trying to get it right. Fighting occasionally is healthy. It is as important as compromise. During fights, couples not only raise their points but also bring unresolved issues to the surface. When two people engage in a fight, it means they are affected. When the urge to fight withers, the relationship is doomed: remember, the opposite of love is not hate or anger but indifference.

You can change only yourself. You’ll just get exhausted if you keep nagging your partner to change his habits or mindset. Trying to change a fully molded person is impossible. The easier task will be to change the way you respond to your partner. Learn how to respect the person he or she is. You must love that person not only for what he is, but also for what he is not.

Is there such thing as forever? This question is commonly asked, but the meaning and impact will only be felt when problems kick in. Yes, your love can last forever. But it is entirely up to you if you will put up with your partner or give up the fight.

How not to fall in love with your male best friend

Yes, it’s inevitable. You spend so much time together, you can talk about anything, and you know each other’s secrets. You buy each other things, “just because I know you’ll like that.” You’re always there for each other, and are in fact each other’s default dates to functions when you couldn’t get anyone else. Sooner or later, at least one of you would fall in love with the other.

We know it’s extremely difficult, especially when you really have so much fun together and—admit it—he’s attractive. But it is possible to not ever be romantically involved with your male friend. It is usually advisable to keep things that way, too. So here are a few tips to help prevent you from crossing the line.

1. Keep in mind that your best friend will always be your best friend. The “mind over matter” rule might still work for you, writes Anna Lorraine Miranda-baysa in “How Not To Fall In Love With Your Best Friend.” Forbid yourself from entertaining thoughts of your best friend being the man you’ve been waiting for, because you will eventually convince yourself that he is—even if he probably is not. Whenever your mind wanders dangerously close to that line, give yourself a good, firm shake.

2. Decide not to be attracted. In fact, try to feel embarrassed about even considering it. Of course you became friends because you saw a lot of great qualities in each other that made you click, that’s why it’s inevitable to feel attracted to each other. But to avoid falling for his great qualities, humorously think of his worst traits—especially the really weird and gross ones. It helps, says Anna, who has a male best friend herself.

"Know all the negative consequences falling in love would have on your precious friendship."

3. Avoid situations where you are left alone with each other, “as this allows a breeding place for passion.”

4. Know all the negative consequences falling in love would have on your precious friendship. Crossing the line could only bring disappointment for both of you and change your friendship forever. According to “Why You Shouldn’t Take The Next Step with Your Best Friend,” , whenever you feel yourself falling, ask yourself these questions: “Would he be a suitable match for me? Is there a future for us? Am I attracted to my best friend sexually? What are my real reasons? Am I afraid to be alone? Am I willing to risk losing the friendship?” Know that when you risk falling for a friend, you risk not just getting your heart broken but also ruining one of your most cherished friendships when things don’t work out.

5. Choose to love him as your best friend. Or as a brother, if you must. Know that you would be willing to do anything for him, care for him, and love him like a true brother, even if he’s not family. And be comforted that he would do the same for you. But decide not to throw romantic and sexual thoughts into the equation. “It’s a decision, not merely an emotion,” writes Anna. Appreciate that rare solid friendship you have formed with him and keep yourself from losing it just because of selfish, uncontrolled feelings.

Do you have a male best friend? How did you keep yourself from falling in love with him?

You are not satisfying me...

A lot of women experience anorgasmia and the sad thing is, they are more than willing to have “non-orgasmic sex” again because they don’t want to hurt their partner.

The dilemma, to tell or not to tell, is maybe as old as Mt. Mayon. Many will opt not to tell to avoid conflict. As a result, the sexual act will be routinary. The poor guy will just continue what he thought is gratifying for you and the unsatisfied girl will be compelled to just get it over and done with. Worse, it may cause suppressed resentment, which may lead to separation.

Why do we have to tell? Because men can be less sensitive of women’s sexual patterns. Not because they have no will, but because they are just unaware. Your genitals are totally dissimilar. So, do you really expect him to master your vagina? Your man might also be inexperienced, tired, or less adventurous. Others just emulate porn because they don’t have any other springboard. When the guy explodes, it’s done! And they can’t even tell if you had orgasm or not.

Also, you have to tell because it is your responsibility to be honest. A sound relationship’s foundation is trust and honesty. Making love issues are as major as faithfulness issues. Not saying it is a sin of omission. Not telling might result to subliminal distaste that will eventually affect your affection for him. You might end up waking up in the morning yearning for another guy.

A number of women just woke up in the morning yearning for another guy.

But surely he will be hurt? Yes I agree, especially guys take pride on their member’s power. Never ever tell him outright, “Hey, you lack sexual technique.” Never ever tell his friends or your friends that he sucked in bed. One way of dealing with this is to guide and encourage him but still giving him the total control over you. Give him soft moans when you’re enjoying, and react less when you are not. For example, you can moan, stroke John Smith when you’re liking it, and stop when you’re uncomfy. Lead his fingers to your sensitive spots. Proactively assume the position that you want. Say, “there,” “slowly,” “deeper,” “faster,” “don’t stop,” and “yes” (with full honesty). He might not get it immediately, but your efforts will have its rewards.

If you don’t wanna tell him, here’s one point of reflection. What if he does not enjoy making love with you, but does not want to hurt your feelings as well. And because he’s not telling, he will just sublimate his sexual desires to another person.

The upside of being single..

Feeling a little down in the dumps 'cause it's another lonely night? So you’ve noticed that you’re the only one in your circle of friends who isn’t attached, engaged, or married? Snap out of it! Being single is not a curse.

If you're already hearing yourself saying, "I NEED a boyfriend," you're virtually admitting that you are pathetic. Remember, it's a desperate woman's mantra. Wanting to be loved and to be in a relationship is just normal; but you have to realize that if you love yourself more, you will become a better person.

Being single affords each of us the opportunity to discover who we are, what we do and don't like, how we deal with things, what we want out of life, what our expectations are, what our potentials and limitations are, what energizes and empowers us, and what discourages and disappoints us.

If you learn to satisfy yourself and meet your needs, you would be able to share yourself to someone as a whole. Having someone else to fill in the gaps and trying to get from someone what is lacking in you could lead to disappointments and resentments.

Learn to love and accept yourself—just the way you are. Know that you’re worthy and deserving of only the best. Attracting love into your life starts by developing the attraction factor from the inside out.

There's no reason to feel pathetic if you’re living a fulfilling life. So, why not make the most of it? Sit back, have a soda, and try belching as loud as you can!

Would you go through Revirginization?

Being a woman is a herculean task; things become all the more difficult as she ages. Aside from the vicissitudes of a fast-paced life, women need to maintain their beauty. Women need to age with grace, remaining tasteful and extremely sexy. If not, they will be trapped in the four walls of insecurity, and lay in the bottomless pit of hopelessness. That’s why women engage in doctor shopping to buy back several youthful years. They have done this not only to feel good about themselves but also to please their partners.

Most women focus on their skin and face when trying to look young, but others focus on their vagina, too. Let’s talk about vaginal repair because you might need this someday. Vagina would get super stretched every time a baby is born. It was not a pleasant sight. Just imagine the size difference between an infant’s head and a penis. After several deliveries and a series of stressful expansion, the vaginal muscles can become loose and weak.

ome women resort to unconventional ways of regaining the tightness of their vagina and making it look young. One popular way is by using alum (tawas). Dissolving it in water to use as vaginal wash can temporarily tighten the vagina. However, it has the tendency to become too tight and dry, making intercourse painful.

Others use toothpaste and brandy to keep it fresh and youthful. It seems funny and surprising but women tend to do a lot of things—sometimes bordering on the outrageous—just to obtain the illusion of being a virgin again.

Kegel exercise, which involves contracting and relaxing the muscles of the pelvic floor, can also help strengthen vaginal muscles. But if you have been Kegling enough yet still feel a Rubik’s cube can get in, you may have to consider another option.

No worries, the vagina can now be repaired. There are procedures that address vaginal structural defects, aesthetic reconstruction, and tightening. It is done to repair defects or rejuvenate the vagina. Rejuvenating the vagina can help improve your sex life, as it enhances sexual experience, making the entrance of the penis very pleasurable. A word of caution: make sure you have this procedure done by a professional. Research on the doctors who do such procedures and ask about the “sexperiences” of those who’ve had it done. And it does not come cheap, mind you.

Since it is an elective surgery, it is not usually covered by insurance. Vaginoplasty (vaginal tightening) takes about an hour, and recovery takes about one to two weeks. The patient usually feels sore after. You may return to work the next day, but you shouldn’t engage in strenuous activities for four to six weeks.

There’s nothing wrong with going over the edge with vaginal repair. Defects of nature can be corrected after all. But you really have to prepare yourself, contemplate on the results, and talk to your partner before going through it.

Would you pose in the nude?

It's not unusual these days for some women to want their own nude photograph. After all, the human body has been artistically explored and exhibited for so long.

For some people, posing nude is a "tool of expression," a way to convey ideas. It also improves one's perception of his or her own body image.

'Think you can pose in the nude? In case you suddenly decide you'd want to, here are some tips you can try to ease the awkwardness.

1. Get someone you know to take your photo. This could be a close friend who doesn't even have to be a professional photographer. If you're lucky to be friends with a pro, then book him or her for your portrait.

2. Plan your preferred pose beforehand so you won't have to waste time experimenting while you're already naked. You can also practice this in the mirror so you can easily tell the photographer about your vision for the photo.

3. Shoot in your own space so you can be comfortable with the surroundings. If you plan on doing it in your house or room, tidy up your room, and change the bedsheets, curtains, and pillowcases.

4. Be confident. This is your nude photo and there's no pressure to be perfect. Your body is yours to love, and a nude photo should teach you to appreciate it more.

To lift or not to lift sagging breasts

When you look in the mirror one morning, you notice in horror that your breasts are sagging, pendulous, and have lost their shape. If one breast is lower than the other, maybe your husband is not ambidextrous. But if your nipples and areolae are pointing downward, Houston we have a problem!

A woman’s breasts can change over time, losing their shape and firmness due to aging, breastfeeding, weight changes, gravity, and pregnancy. That is why some resort to mastopexy, or breast lift, in simple terms. By removing excess skin, tightening the surrounding tissue, and lifting the underlying breast tissue, the surgical procedure reshapes and improves breast contour. This can rejuvenate the breast profile and make it look youthful again. Mastopexy is different from breast augmentation or reduction since breast lifting does not significantly change your breast size.

After the lifting and reshaping process, the nipples and areolae are repositioned to a natural and more youthful height. If necessary, enlarged areolas are reduced by excising the skin perimeter, removing excess skin.

The best candidates for this procedure are women who are healthy and have a stable weight, are non-smokers, and of course, who can afford it. No absolute contraindications exist for breast lifting. Yet one relative contraindication is future pregnancy because of lactation complications.

Before the surgery, consider these things: choice of a surgeon you can trust and who adheres to a strict code of ethics, your general health status, your expectations and desired outcome. The type of incision should also be considered. You should ask what kind of anesthesia will be used because this substance might cause forgetfulness. Would you want that after surgery, you have nice firm breasts but can’t remember your husband’s name?

Getting mastopexy is a personal choice. If you think it will help boost your self-esteem, then go for it. But remember, medicine and surgery are not an exact science. While everybody hopes for the best, there is no guarantee. There are risks and possible complications like unfavorable scarring, infection, changes in nipple sensation, damage to deeper structures, persistent pain, and possible revisional surgery. We have not even mentioned yet the normal course of treatment, wherein there are post-operative medications and the need to wear bandages that bring huge discomfort. It is also worth noting that effects of gravity and aging will persist and sagging may gradually recur over time.

As early as now, we should accept that we shall grow old and beauty will wither. But age with grace; after all, it is not the destination—it’s the journey that matters most.

The truth about unsafe sex

Sex can be so pleasurable, exciting, and worth longing for. But before you engage in it, ask yourself, “If this sexual episode will be published in the newspapers tomorrow, will I be proud and happy? Or maybe sorry and sad?” Remember, every sexual act is a new and different scenario. You might be doing safe sex for five years, but one ordinary “not so safe orgasmic encounter” might change everything.

Unsafe sex is anything that will place an individual at RISK, may it be your health due to STD, your reputation, your relationship, and your sanity (for most). But these are just immediate effects. It can be cured by antibiotics, gossip mongering will have a natural death, new love can be found, and temporary insanity will cease. But really, the longstanding aftermath is depression, and the permanent change that will transpire in your personhood. It would be very difficult to repair tarnished self-esteem. Instead of laddering up with your career, it will thwart growth a little bit since you will spend your time recuperating from a disaster. One got pregnant, her lover left her, and her husband filed for a divorce. Instead of shopping for your favorite perfume, there you are in the drugstore asking for a better pill for your infection. Life itself is already complicated, and you don’t need another BS, just because you had one risky sex.

As a responsible woman, before doing it, STOP and THINK. Not too obvious though that might ruin the moment. You might also want learn diplomacy skills in communicating to your partner that “YOU CAN’T DO IT RIGHT NOW” cause it’s unsafe. You have to make them realize that you are not rejecting the person, but the act itself can be done in a more responsible way.

Want to make him hot for you?

Heighten your guys's sexual urges with any of these foolproof sensual moves he'll surely never forget!


1. Instead of moaning loudly, try longer and softer moans.
Guys love to be worshipped-play to his ego and let him know he's doing all the fight things and hitting all the right spots whisper his name into his ear from time to time and you'll surely feel him get together.


2. Rub warm oil all over his body.
Not only will this awaken his tactile sense, but the feel of smooth, wet sliding bodies rubbing against each other make for fun play, too.


3. Do all things at once.
Pull his hair and nibble his neck while playing with his nip with your hand. Multiple pressure points turned ob at the same time will send him into an intense titillation.

4 Be the dominatrix.
Oust him hard against the wall or onto the bed and let him know what's coming to him. Blindfold him and hold his wrists down and show him who the boss is.

5 Suit him with PREMIERE Ultra Thin condom using your mouth.
Let him tingle and indulge into the intense sensation of his Royal Dynasty in your mouth. slide it on smoothly. With the thinness of the condom, he will feel as if nothing is there, securing you a wild moan for a "job" well done.

6 Round two with PREMIERE Dotted condom.
Great jobs certainly deserve a follow up. Make it more sensual by suing this Condom variant. Ironically, these dots will make for a smooth and "explosive” ride a definite knockout.



source:

madam shec
www.premiere.com.ph/

Choosing between LOVE and SEX...

There has been this long-standing question: Would you go with the one you love or the one who loves you? It can be more difficult than a board exam question but that’s just how it goes; life sometimes throws a joke on us, and the difficult part is how we have to make a stand.

Now here is another eternal puzzle: if you only have one option, would you stay in a relationship that has great sex but less love or in a partnership with pure love yet sex is bad? You might say this question is a no-brainer. It’s easy to say you’ll choose a relationship with greater love over sex; yet let’s still try to see both sides of the coin.

It will burn you big time to sleep every night with a guy who is “Microsoft” (micro and soft) or with a partner that can never bring your sail to the harbor. You’ll only end up resorting to porn flicks or fantasizing about your ex who happens to be a jerk yet is gifted with a really nice, huge member. If your man cannot satisfy your needs in bed, you end up hanging out with friends too often, all the while pretending that all is good, including the humping. But if you remain unable to resolve this issue, the relationship will eventually crumble; it is in fact one of the grounds for annulment or divorce.

On the other hand, what if sex is heavenly but you remain just that: a fuck buddy with no commitment to hold on to, with nothing more than a smoke and shower after sex? Would you settle for this kind of situation? The good thing about this is you’ll have a lot of happy hormones, making your immune system more efficient. There are also no emotional attachments, allowing you to have more with another person, if you wanted to. Yet the downside is quite harsh: you’ll feel like a big slut, used and misused. And there will be a time when you’ll finally get satiated.

Sex alone would only make you lonely, while love without great sex would leave you quick-tempered and rose petal-dry. Love and sex should go together; it should co-exist and complement each other. If one is missing, the couple should strive to obtain both. It’s always better if the relationship is founded on true love: love that is less of a concept and more of a decision and passion that springs from within.

Humans have a hierarchy of needs. If one need is unsatisfied, you will get fixated. No matter how hard you try to move further, your unsatisfied needs will haunt you. So it is your job to pursue love, then real making love, and finally nirvana.

How not to say "I love you"

Have you ever been in a relationship when you constantly say, “I love you”? Or were you in a situation when you can’t even say those three words?

The most important lesson about the words “I love you” is this: Your actions must always be in-sync with these words—or the meaning behind this statement becomes null and void!

When one is saying “I love you” too many times a day (that means three times or more), this signals an underlying anxiety disorder. Just as a person with an anxiety disorder might check over and over again to make sure a door is locked.

Sometimes these are almost like compulsive acts. If someone really does it that often, she could be seeking reassurance. Perhaps she feels he is such a wonderful catch and she can’t do any better, and that he has more options that could make her feel insecure in the relationship. Being directly or indirectly aware of a power differential can lead to anxiety and reassurance seeking.

To prevent from possibly annoying your guy, here are some tips for saying those three little (but so big!) words.

1) Don’t rush; be sure to really mean what you say. You may express your feelings on the phone, in person, on line, by mail. Choose your favorite way, you may change it at any time. Think about how you'd like to let your partner know the way you feel, keeping in mind that uttering those words may give birth to a lifelong memory. If spontaneity works for you, wait for the perfect moment. If you're more methodical, consider writing a love letter first, then telling your mate in person the next time you get together.

2) After you’ve said, “I love you,” tell him the specific traits and habits that you love about him. Don’t just repeat this generic phrase or you will chew the entire flavor out of it. Hold his hands, and make eye contact, this gives the moment the intimacy it deserves.

3) Don’t say your first “I love you” during a time of intensity—be that either making love or making war. If you say it during sex, your partner may doubt the sincerity of your proclamation. If you say it during a fight, you might only be doing so to gain control of the situation.

Remember it’s always better to learn new ways to say or express what you feel.

Things you should know about your body...

Here's an inside look at how women’s bodies work..

1. Some Bacteria Are Good For You
Bugs can be beneficial in certain parts of your body. The average woman’s vagina is loaded with bacteria, fungi, and viruses, and they’re there for a reason: they usually promote cleanliness. By absorbing debris and fighting one another, they help keep the vaginal environment balanced and healthy. Don’t be overzealous with soap and perfume products as this area of your body is designed to look after itself.

2. Thin Bra Straps Cause Headaches
According to doctors at the University of Texas in Dallas, a tight strap that digs into your shoulders can put downward pressure on the cervical nerve that runs from your back to your shoulder. The result can be frequent headaches, neck pain or numbness. Over time, it can cause pain that radiates all the way from your shoulders to your hands. Have your bra size properly measured. Throw away bras with skinny straps that dig in.

3. Women Have More Grey Matter Than Men
Men may have bigger brains, but women have more of the grey matter that’s vital for information processing. This explains why they perform just as well on intelligence tests, despite the difference in brain size.

4. It’s Essential For women to Drink Safely
Women’s bodies contain less water and more body fat, which means alcohol reaches the liver more quickly and in higher concentrations than in men. We not only get drunk more quickly, but are also more vulnerable to long-term damage to our heart, liver, pancreas, and nervous system. Hormones play a role, too. Women become even more vulnerable to the effects of alcohol around their period. Drink safely—no more than two to three units a day (one unit equals ten milliliters), no more than 14 units a week, with a few alcohol-free days. And be sure to have food when drinking. Everyone underestimates how much they drink, so be totally honest—or you’re just fooling yourself. More than six units in one sitting counts as binge drinking, which in the short term doubles your risk of stroke.

5. The Time of The Month Affects How You Feel Pain
Your perception of pain alters during your menstrual cycle. Burn your hand around that time and it may hurt more. Researchers at the University of Michigan found that estrogen is vital for regulating the brain’s natural ability to suppress pain. Just before ovulation, when estrogen levels are highest, the brain’s natural painkilling system responds more powerfully, releasing chemicals to dampen pain signals. But when estrogen levels fall, the system is less efficient.

6. Our Bodies Aren’t Designed To Walk Upright
If women walked on four legs, they’d have fewer pelvic floor problems. In women’s bodies, the pelvic floor muscles have a lot of work to do. We have the weight of the bladder plus the strain of pregnancy and childbirth. The pelvic floor is the only area of the body that undergoes such stresses. To strengthen it, tighten the muscles around your back passage, vagina, and front passage and pull up inside as if you’re trying to stop passing urine. It should feel like a ‘lift and squeeze up’ inside. Aim for 10 quick pull-ups and 10 slow, holding in for four seconds, three times daily. Do as many as you can and build up gradually.

7. Women’s Brains Make Less Serotonin
It may be why women are two to three times more likely to suffer depression, and why a low carb diet can leave you irritable. Eating carbohydrate0rich food, such as fruit, bread, rice and pasta, stimulates the production of serotonin—a neurotransmitter that helps to boost mood.

8. One in Four Women is Iron Deficient
A recent nutrition survey shows many women aren’t getting enough iron. Iron helps make hemoglobin, found in red blood cells, which transport oxygen to the body tissues. Red meat is the best source of iron; it’s also found in dried fruit and green leafy vegetables. Avoid tea and coffee with meals—they can hinder iron absorption.

9. Giving Up Smoking Has Greater Benefits For Women
Women smokers may be at a higher risk of heart attack than men who smoke, and women are prone to developing incurable Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD), which kills more women than breast cancer. Smoking also increases the risk of at least ten cancers, and women smokers are more likely than men to develop lung cancer.

10. Drugs Can Work Differently For Women
Doctors are finding out that men and women react differently to certain drugs—certain antibiotics and some medication for hypertension are more effective in women, for example, as are morphine-like painkillers.

11. We’re All Very Different
Vaginas and cervixes come in many shapes and sizes. If you find smears uncomfortable, tell the nurse or doctor as speculums do come in a variety of sizes. Sometimes women feel discomfort because the doctor or nurse has to search for the cervix. Wombs and cervixes can be tilted at various angles in different women and it may be hard for the doctor or nurse to find it immediately.

12. Killer Heels Really Are Bad For Your Health
Worn too often, high heels can cause painful bunions, calluses, and corns—and it’s not just the feet that suffer. High heels can affect your posture, putting stress on the spine, resulting in back problems. Long periods of wearing high heels can shorten calf muscles, leading to back, hip, and knee difficulties.

13. Diabetic Women are More At Risk of Heart Attack
A man with diabetes has double the risk of heart disease; for women, the risk is raised up to seven times.

14. Gum Disease Can Trigger premature Birth
Studies show that women with severe gum disease may be twice as likely to have a pre-term baby and may be at more risk of pre-eclampsia. Researchers at the University of Alabama think bacteria from diseased gums can trigger increases in the levels of compounds that induce labor. By giving pregnant women regular gum treatment, the team reduced premature births by up to 84 percent.

15. Women Wake More Quickly From Anesthetics
Women come round faster—in an average of seven minutes rather than the 11 it takes men to recover; possibly because women are less susceptible to anesthesia.

16. Aspirin Protects Women Against Stroke
Researchers found that while a daily aspirin reduced the risk of a first heart attack for middle-aged men, it doesn’t for women. But aspirin reduces women’s risk of stroke (an effect not seen in men) and reduces risk of heart attack in women of 65 and more.

17. Women Need To Take More Care of Their Bones
Women comprise 80 percent of those with osteoporosis. After menopause, levels of estrogen—the hormone that protects against bone loss—fall and women can lose up to 20 percent of bone mass in the first five to seven post-menopause years. But osteoporosis is preventable: Take weight-bearing exercises, don’t smoke, and get plenty of calcium and vitamin D.

18. Genes Affect Orgasms
If you’re among the one in three women who rarely or never climaxes during intercourse, it may be due to genes. When doctors at St. Thomas’ Hospital compared to 4,000 female twins they found that the ability to reach orgasm was genetic. This may have developed originally as a way of weeding out less desirable men—that is, if a man can’t bring a woman to orgasm, he is probably not a good long-term mate.

19. Heart Disease Symptoms Can Be Different
For some women, the symptoms of heart attack are the same as in men, although women may be more likely to experience indigestion-like pain around the breast bone, shortness of breath, overwhelming tiredness, and feeling generally unwell, rather than the classic, crushing chest pain. The important thing is to take symptoms seriously, whatever your age, and know your risk.

20. It’s harder For Women To Get To Sleep
The US National Sleep Foundation found 50 percent of women had disrupted sleep for two or three days round their period, when estrogen and progesterone levels fall. It’s thought that both these hormones may affect how you sleep—while progesterone may make you feel more sleepy. Peri-menopausal symptoms such as night sweats are also a factor.

21. Alzheimer’s Is a Greater Threat To Women
There are three times as many women with Alzheimer’s disease as men. However, new research has shown that women taking estrogen had lower levels of the protein beta-amyloid in their blood. In Alzheimer’s disease, beta-amyloid form “plaques” in the brain, which lead to the death of brain cells.

Reasons a guy disappears on you..

Everything was going so perfectly: the guy you like asks you out; you go on a fantastic date; he asks you out two or three more times; he seems to be really into you; you take things a little further. The next day, he’s gone. Without so much as an excuse or an explanation. How upsetting is that?

Before you tear your hair out figuring out what went wrong (and blaming yourself for that matter), realize that this might actually be the best way to go. Remember the adage “What you don’t know won’t hurt you?” The article "Why men go poof" cites one of the reasons a man disappears on you: he probably just wants to spare your feelings by not telling you what’s really on his mind—which could be along the lines of “You’re a great woman but there is no chemistry between us,” “I’m looking for casual dating and it seems you want more,” or “I just wanted a booty call.” You wouldn’t want it if he ever told you that to your face, right? He’s also probably just avoiding the drama that would ensue if he ever does.

Reasons why a guy would inexplicably stop seeing and communicating with you. Learn from these and move on. You’re probably better off without him anyway.

1. He’s chasing someone else. Men love the chase. Some even enjoy just the chase. So if he suddenly lost interest after you’ve gone out, you know he’s found another prey. Don’t take it personally.

2. He’s focused on everything but love. It could be his family, the rent he has to pay, his upcoming promotion or trouble with his boss. While your few dates may have been amazing at some point, it might have been a temporary thing to distract him from the other things going on in his life.

3. You’re a friend. The author warns women that sometimes men can’t tell when we’re interested in them. Romance can complicate friendships, and since guys value friendships as much as women do, they are always wary of elevating things to a more serious level.

4. He thinks you’re too serious. If he’s not ready to take the relationship seriously (and by this we also mean making it exclusive) then it’s not going to work. If he thinks you’re “too serious” for him, then you’re better off without him: it wasn’t clicking at the right time.

5. His damned sidekick. Guys love to have partners in crime. And if his best buddy is still playing the field and partying hard, it will still be very hard for him to pull himself away from it all.

6. He’s into one of your friends. If a guy you like happens to like one of your friends, naturally he’s going to try to get to her by being with you. This can be very misleading for you, and while usually it works itself out pretty quickly, we hope this never happens to you. Never risk your friendships for any romantic prospects.

So if you find that a once so persistent guy suddenly stops seeing or talking to you, he is most likely doing so for one of the reasons above. Spare yourself the time and trouble of finding out what went wrong. He’s probably not worth it. The right guy for you will never leave you wondering about such things.

Are you a stalker-girlfriend?

There is such a thing as a woman’s intuition, wherein we just know, when our man is cheating on us. Yet there is a thin line that separates this from simply being too paranoid—and that’s the sheer lack of trust in your partner. You must avoid at all cost (apart from cheating, of course). Trust is one of the strongest foundations of a relationship, and anything that would threaten or ruin this could spell the end of your relationship. Try to assess yourself by answering the following:

1. Are you checking his email, his phone, or his Friendster account for suspicious names and messages?
2. Are you telling “white lies” to prevent your partner from being hurt by the truth—or simply to avoid a heated argument?
3. Are you snooping around your partner’s private things (i.e. his wallet, drawer, private records—even mobile phone bills?)
4. Are you stalking your own boyfriend—by driving by his house, checking if he’s at work, or worse, following his car?
5. Are you asking one or more of your friends to spy on your partner during a gimmick, listen in on his conversations, or gather information about him for you? Or do you actually request that they take photos of him for you while he’s out?
6. Do you call or text him excessively to check up on him? Did you ring his phone at least 10 times when he still won’t pick up or reply to your messages?

If you answered “Yes” to any of these self-evaluation questions, get a grip on yourself and think of the consequences of your actions. Assess if you are being reasonable or just paranoid. By losing trust in him, you will eventually cause him to lose trust in you—ruining a potentially beautiful relationship. Don’t let that fault fall upon you, no matter what.

Top 10: Signs She's Flirting

Flirting is an important behavior that is both complex and fundamental. Everyone in the world, at some point in their lives will need to acquaint themselves with the art of flirtation if they want to experience the pleasures of the opposite sex. While there are mountains of advice to guide men on how to flirt effectively, that’s only half the story.

Men must also be able to recognize the signs she's flirting. While any one of these visual cues taken alone often won't constitute a green light, a combination of multiple flirtatious cues should pique your interest.Women can sometimes be hard to read, but if you're armed with a guide to signs she's flirting, then you're already one step ahead.

1. She approaches you to talk
Her approach may be closely tied to No. 2, but this cue takes it a step further. Cutting through any game she may be playing, her approach and specific engagement by speaking is playing her strongest flirting card. It allows her, while speaking to you, to maintain eye contact, play with her hair, lightly touch you, and mimic your mannerisms among other flirting techniques. If she’s come over to talk to you, she wants to know what you’re all about. It’s the first step in an interview process called dating.

2. She enters your personal space
Personal space, by definition, is where others are not. When a woman enters this space, say, brushing past you with a glance and a smile, she’s inviting a response with this sure sign she's flirting. The caliber and character of her invasion will give you cues as to how you should respond.

3.She makes eye contact
It has been said that the eyes are the windows to the soul, and that through the eyes truth can be gleamed. Eye contact is a sign of confidence and trust. She’s stating that she is not interested in games and that her intentions are straightforward. The duration of the eye contact is proportional to her level of initial interest.

4.She touches you
The slight touch that sends chills up both your spines and makes your hair stand on end is one of the hallmark signs she's flirting. When she reaches out and lightly touches your forearm or shoulder, hand or wrist, you know you have a live one. You need to reciprocate because there are few clearer signs she can provide.

5.She plays with her hair
While relatively simple and commonplace, in the right hands a woman's hair is a versatile weapon. When trying to get your attention, she may twirl her hair in her fingers or let it cascade in front of one eye, adding a sense of come-hither mystery to her persona.

6.She mimics your body movements
For some reason, when human beings are interested or infatuated with each other, they begin to pick up certain traits from the other person. If she’s mimicking your mannerisms -- the way you hold a drink or the way you’re sitting -- she may very well be interested in gaining your attention and is giving you solid signs she's flirting. Imitation is a rather high form of flattery, after all.

7.She isolates herself
If, after having made eye contact, she strays from her pack, then she’s trying to flirt with you. Women know that the most difficult defense for a man to penetrate is her wall of friends and well-wishers. If she’s specifically removing herself from that fortress then this is one of the sure signs she's flirting and letting you know she’s lowering her defensive barriers to let you in.

8.She draws attention to her mouth
A woman’s mouth can be extremely seductive, and she’s fully aware of this fact. Some of the effective signs she's flirting will have her applying lip gloss, running her finger across her lip or using the straw in her cocktail instead of just sipping from the glass. There is a tremendous amount of flirtatious energy tied up in a woman’s lips. Lips are flirting tools that are both potent and effective.

9.She keeps walking by
If it seems like she continues to walk by with apparently no sense of why she’s there, she’s there for you. She’s trying to get you to notice her with this obvious sign she's flirting, and you need to say something endearing. By walking past repeatedly, perhaps out of her way, she’s giving you a sense that she wants your attention, but she's making you work for it.

10.She smiles
When a woman has an interest in you, her smile can hold your attention from across a crowded room and it is definitely one of the major signs she's flirting. It takes an effort on her part to do so, so if she’s exerting this kind of effort, engage in her flirting by returning the smile.


While it may not seem like it to the average man, women flirt and spend as much time obsessing over their actions as their male counterparts. Since that’s the case, it would behoove any man to not only hone his own flirting skills, but sharpen his observational skills as well.

Why he hasn't proposed - - yet

You’ve been in a serious relationship for three to five years, you’re close to each other’s family, and you’ve shared many deep conversations and intimate moments (not to mention great sex). Or, for those who want to formalize relationships: you may have been dating seriously for at least a year or more but he still hasn’t asked you to be his girlfriend. In both cases, you’re left wondering: why hasn’t he proposed?

Before you start tearing your hair out and exhausting your brain in trying to figure him out, understand the possible reasons he may have for not proposing yet and know how to deal with them.

1. He hasn’t thought of it. He doesn’t need to get to the next level the way you do. It might go against his ways to be tied to a wife at the moment. But show (not tell) him that you’re a prize catch.

2. You’re his virtual wife already—why should he make it formal? You already do for him the things a wife does: cook, shop, give advice, sex, and care for him. If you want to marry him, it has to be worth his while. “Ask yourself: What does he get if he marries me that he doesn’t get if we keep things the way they are—and is that valuable to him?” Get the correct answer to this and put it into action.

3. None of his pals are married and he doesn’t want to give up his independence. He may love you with all his heart and looks at no other woman but you, yet the thought of settling down and possibly losing his independence may discourage him. Assure him of the freedoms he will keep and new ones he’ll enjoy once you’re committed.

4. He likes it the way it is, why change? "Lucky for you, eventually he’ll realize he’s getting older. Not as quickly as women realize it, but time does come when guys realize they don’t want to be alone forever." If he speaks of such things, agree that it’s a valid concern—nothing more.

5. He is in no hurry biologically or emotionally. Guys can take no notice of the biological clock’s ticking much longer and with less consequence. And for most of them, earning money is "supplying plenty of satisfaction;" kids are not in their list of priorities because they want to maximize their “fulfillment quotient.” But he will eventually want kids. Question is: will it be with you?

6. He’s not yet ready financially. We all know it’s expensive to get married and eventually start a family. He may just be saving up or would like to be secure in his career first so he can provide for and take care of you.

7. He’s unsure about you. Realize that having been together long enough to even think of taking it to the next level is already a good sign. Maybe he’s just contemplating really well and being extra careful before he devotes himself fully to you. Just enjoy each moment with him, and he’ll soon decide that you really are the one for him.

8. He’s afraid to ask (but don’t count on it). Unless he’s really clinically torpe, he’s not afraid. He just isn’t ready, hasn’t thought of it, or simply doesn’t want to. So if you can’t wait any longer, best to get his thoughts on getting married now—specifically with you. You may not like the answer, but at least you know. But if you still have time, practice the previous tips, and the answer might sweep you both off your feet.

Practice Makes Perfect

Can you ask the girl beside you if she touches herself? Yes, ask if she masturbates, now! Bet you cannot, what about you? Do you? Or can you? And even if you can, can you talk about it openly? Well, I’m not forcing you to touch yourself but let me just tell you that it is amoral. Meaning, it can go both ways, it can do you good or it can have negative effects.

Masturbation is self-stimulation of genitals that brings sexual sensation and eventually orgasm. Touching yourself is actually making love with yourself. Remember the maxim that you can only love others fully if you love yourself. So if you have feeling of inadequacies or sexual disturbance, how can you resolve or give yourself to others and have a blissful lovemaking? Masturbation is healthy and can help you have a better sex life. But of course, a word of caution, you should never in anyway be fixated with your own fingers-it will not only erase your fingerprints but will also alienate your partner.

Furthermore, touching yourself can be pleasurable, relaxing and therapeutic. Just like massage, it can have stroke varieties. It can be soft or hard, circular or with deep pressure. All of these motion combos can be done to achieve body satisfaction. It can also be basic or advanced. Aside from the pleasure that it brings, it can help you locate your erogenous zones, G-spot, and the maneuvers that makes you moan and forget your name. Once you know it, you can share it to your partner, thus having higher chances of mind-blowing sex.

Now if you are okay with masturbation and you do not have any second thoughts, you can actually surprise your partner by touching yourself in front of him. Of course you need to discern first if he will like it or will he freak out and run. But for most guys, they love it. Maybe when you are running out of sexual positions, try parallel play. It is very sexy. Both of you can also do mutual masturbation.

If you want to experience this, just get yourself in the mood for doing it. Relax, lock the door, and have your sister send your puppy to the park first. Find a comfortable position, undress and feel sexy. Then fantasize and imagine. It can be the last porn you’ve seen, a sex magazine, Manolo pumps, or your hottest sexual encounter. Slowly touch yourself, explore your body parts. Touch yourself with one or two fingers with different pressure, motion, speed and intensity. Timing is important. Change phase, change hands. Breath deeply and fantasize some more till it heightens your excitement. And remember, your ring finger is a preferable since it’s powerful but gentle. In your first few instances, you might not reach the zenith, but believe me, practice makes perfect.

INFIDELITY: What are the warning signs?