Revenge sex or kiss-and-make-up sex

After a break up you usually end up missing the other person terribly, especially if it was a long relationship. You suddenly become nostalgic about so many things you shared with him, such as things you did together, places you visited, food you ate, and—admit it—the lovemaking you had. You cannot sleep and nights become colder everyday because you yearn for him.

With this predicament, some would then resort to masturbation, while others prefer having a sexual partner. The worst part is how that longing builds up as time goes by and becomes too painful and unbearable. That’s why one text or call can make you run toward him.

And now here’s the scenario: you accept his invitation to have dinner, wearing your sexiest lingerie to boot. You go to your favorite restaurant, where you eat a lot of oysters and have a couple of drinks. And because you miss him so much, you give yourself to him once more. There’s nothing wrong with that but make sure you qualify the intention beforehand: is it a kiss-and-make-up sex or just revenge sex?

Whatever it is, you have to be careful because more often than not, the wild sex you would certainly have results to pregnancy: since you miss him so much, you get right into the act—and in your haste, you can get pretty careless.

But what happens if, after one wild unprotected sex and he simply says, “See you when I see you”? You have unwittingly become his new fuck buddy. Dumbfounded, you end up crying again, realizing how stupidly you acted.

This scenario is in fact very common. So before you get yourself into this situation again, don’t miss that important step of making clear what his intentions are. Does he truly miss your whole being? Or does he just miss your sex face?

Among the reasons guys call their exes are when they had a fight with their new girl, when they have personal problems, when they’ve heard you’ve moved on and started dating again, or when they want to know if they still have control over you and can still hurt you. If you find out that any of these are his reasons, don’t even think about having sex with him. Sex may be therapeutic for him, but it might hurt you even more—and you’ll now be the one in need of therapy.

Some guys do have noble reasons for calling on you again: maybe they still love you or they suddenly realize that you’re the one they want to be with forever. How do you know? These guys will not give you sob stories to get you in the sack; they will give you realities. These guys will not nitpick on the relationship and would instead focus on things that can be done to nurture love.

Remember, true love involves wanting the other person’s greater good. It also does not rush. He’ll give you time to think if you want him back. And before you decide to get back together, you try to resolve all issues first.

Don’t get carried away. Avoid having sex prior to thinking and talking in bed; it is better to start with thinking and talking, then later deciding to have sex—for as long as you like.

Long Distance Sex

How do you keep your man-friend sexually happy when you’re oceans apart from each other?

This is among the many challenges that a long distance relationship (LDR) faces. But just as how it is with keeping the LDR romance work, this can be done through a little creativity, imagination, and eagerness from both parties to make it happen.

Here are some tips to get you started. For sure you can discover more ways to keep your man-friend sexually happy once you get the ball rolling.


1. Instant messenger. Find a common time to go online. Then you can talk “dirty” in real-time. Once you’re online, the possibilities are endless.
2. Use your webcam. This way, you could still see each other’s naughty smiles, hungry looks, and teasing way of biting the lips. You are, of course, free to show “more” than these. Just make sure you lock your room (and not allow anyone else to view your webcam).
3. Phone sex. It still works. Just hearing you moan and purr over the phone can already arouse your man. Try to simulate the act over the phone to make your moaning and purring more convincing. Tell each other as graphically as possible what you want to do, what exactly you are feeling, and if you’re already close to that (albeit imaginary) sexual paradise.
4. Send sexy photos of each other through email or MMS. Men love visuals. Nothing else can make your man’s day than receiving in his email or mobile phone the sexiest photo of you in the middle of the day—wherever he is on the globe.
5. Email him your sexual fantasies. While they say men rarely enjoy reading, I’m sure that will change when he receives an email from you with a really detailed account of what the two of you would be doing if you were left alone together. No limit to the number of words (and type of words) you can use.
6. Text dirty. No time to chat or email a detailed account of your sexual fantasies? Try sending him a text message in the middle of the day (or his day, if he’s in a different time zone). Make it as sweet, sexy, and snappy as possible. It’s guaranteed to bring a naughty smile to his face (at the very least). And you can be sure he’ll be thinking of you, no matter what he’s doing.
7. Plan a rendezvous. Now that you’ve built up all these erotic fantasies online or through phone, nothing can be more exciting than setting a date for a much-awaited rendezvous. Plan it well to make sure all those fantasies DO NOT remain fantasies for long.

Dating mistakes to avoid

Make sure you avoid these common dating mistakes, then, especially on first dates. Doing so ensures you both have a successful dating experience. At the very least, avoiding these will spare you irritating thoughts such as “What was I thinking when I said that?” or “I wish I didn’t do that.”

Dressing inappropriately. At least make an effort to look good, if not your best, for the date. And dress in the proper attire for whatever activity you’ve planned out.

Trying a new restaurant or a place that is beyond your means and having too many plans. Don’t set yourself or your date up for embarrassment by recommending a restaurant you haven’t tried and would later regret visiting. Ditto for a place too fancy that would cost your date more than he bargained for. Also, don’t plan too many activities for your first date, especially if you don’t know each other too well yet. You may be stuck with someone who bores you to tears and have no way out. Just play it by ear.

Talking too much. There should be a fair exchange of words. And when you talk, don’t look away constantly or watch other people because this shows lack of interest in your date and whatever he has to say.

Talking about money, politics, religion, and exes. Avoid these topics at all costs during dates. Focus on getting to know each other’s character and personality through light stories. Avoid being too sensitive and exchanging strong opinions, too. Don’t be shallow or overly confident. It’s good to talk about yourself but not in a way that makes you look like God’s gift to man.

Have sex on the first date. Even if you believe both of you are willing and ready to jump to bed on the first date, wait until you have really gotten to know each other and your intentions for the relationship before you bring sex to the equation. Leave no room for regrets.

Fantasizing about the future is a big no-no. “When you catch yourself trying on his last name before the third date, it's time to remind yourself to slow down. Don’t let your emotions interfere with your ability to think clearly. Until you have time to really get to know someone, it is helpful to not get ahead of yourself; don't strongly attach to some illusion you have created about the person.” This is to avoid depression if it doesn’t work out. Also avoid obsessing over details and over-analyzing the situation and the things he says and does. “Try to tap into your self-confidence and trust that if the relationship is meant to work, it will.”


Ignoring the red flags. It’s one thing not to over-analyze the things he does, but it’s also another to overlook subtle warnings such as being stood up for dates, calls left unanswered, and other jerk signals he may be sending.

Avoid these dating mistakes to be fair to yourself and your date. He may not turn out to be the man of your dreams, but if you are a great date to one man, chances are, more men would want to take you out, too. Keep your options open until you find Mr. Right.

Is it love or lust? How to tell if it's just a booty call

How do you tell if a man is really interested in you…or in going to bed with you?

At some point in a woman’s life, she would really meet a man who, one way or another, would go to great lengths just for a booty call or no-strings-attached sex. In a moment of weakness, some women really do fall for the act—and end up regretting it. So beware of these men and be among the smart ones who elude them. Here are the red flags to take note of:

He only calls late at night. “Late night calls do not equal serious intentions,” reads the article “10 Signs a Man is Not Ready to Commit.” If he only calls late at night, shouldn’t that make you wonder what he could possibly be doing between 8AM to 9PM? Surely, at some point between those hours, he’ll find the time to call or at the very least exchange a few text messages with you. Unless he has a really strict or erratic schedule, if the man has any respect for you, he will call you in a reasonable hour.

He Only Comes to See You Late at Night. He is always too busy to come see you during the day, but as soon as it gets dark (or sometimes in the wee hours of the morning) he’s suddenly at your doorstep—or inviting you to meet up. Similar to late night calls, unless he has a pretty good excuse not to see you during the day, don’t fall for it. The biggest giveaway: the venue. Is it always either at your house or his—behind closed doors? If a guy is truly into you, he will make an excuse to see you during the day.


He is totally focused on your looks and body—and not on anything you have to say. it’s lust if they only care about a woman’s looks and body, already fantasizing about what it would be like to have sex with her. Take a hint. Are you barely talking when you’re out together, and you only see him staring mesmerized at your face—and other parts of your body for that matter? Don’t be fooled; it’s not pure-hearted adoration, trust us. Does he seem bored or irritated when you’re hanging out in a place and situation that could not possibly lead to some action? Or can he go for days or weeks without talking to you? If you answered “yes” to these, whatever he has for you can only be lust.

He does not do things that indicate he’s in love with you. If he’s not doing any of the things that spell he’s in love with you—such as finding you beautiful even when you look your worst, wanting to spend so much time with you no matter the activity or time of day, introducing you to his family and friends, among other things—and instead does the red flags we’ve listed above, you know what to do: get out of that potential mess.

Pleasurable but dangerous

To spice up their sex life, many people resort to different sexual activities considered to be beyond the norms. Some do this to break the matrimonial monotony; others want to feel the hype of extreme risk. There are also those who enjoy having power over a helpless sexual partner. These pleasurable but dangerous activities include engaging in group sex or orgy, trying multiple positions, resorting to sex toys, and attempting erotic asphyxiation.

Group sex. You can actually ask your friends to join you and your partner in this act. However, we shy away from this most of the time. We’d rather do it with strangers than with people we already know. There are certain groups that can arrange your participation in group sex.

Erotic asphyxiation. This is also known as scarfing, choking, edge-play, or breath-control game. It is a process of cutting-off one’s air supply to intensify orgasm. The human brain lacks oxygen as you reach climax. In the movie “Killing Me Softly,” the guy used scarfing to intermittently cut-off the woman’s air supply. The result is euphoric—hence the maxim “You take my breath away.”

Sex in different places...

It has always been a practice to have sex in bed. Sex in bed is very matrimonial. Why not try it in different places? Break the monotony. It is exciting to do it when you know that somebody may see and catch you anytime. Spontaneity and risky sexual experience triggers intense physical excitement. It can be done in public places like an airplane bathroom, public library, club’s bathroom, at your office desk, call center station, sink, car park, and cinemas.

An airplane bathroom: If you are planning to have sex in an airplane, wear something with easy access. When the seatbelt light is off, look at your partner’s eyes, rush to the bathroom, and consummate love. Since space is very limited, he can take you from behind while you are getting leverage from the sink, or you can parallel masturbate while kissing—it’s little more comfy but it will take longer to cum. You may also raise one leg, leaning on the toilet bowl while he’s licking and caressing your front bottom. Safety precautions, however: remember that it is a toilet, so harmful entities might invade your lustful bodies.


Library: Compared to an airplane lavatory, the library (any library for that matter) is super spacious. You can do it standing up or lying down; you can hold on to the bookshelves to get balance, or use the book rack to lean and bend over while doing the doggy style. The danger is, you have more chances of getting caught. But if you keep your ear in an ultra sensitive mode, you can easily detect if somebody’s coming.


Carpark: The car is a place where passion sparks. Many girls lost their virginity inside a car. Sex in the car is very pleasurable—remember Titanic? This can serve as a prelude to getting a room. It would be better for a woman to be on top after you give your man a lip service. Just don’t forget to look for your earrings before your dad vacuums the car.


Before you do it, you have to make sure that your partner agrees with the idea. You should also be careful not to offend other people. Public sex can be really offensive. It may scare horses and minors--especially your minors!!! Lastly, it’s also a good idea to look for places where the chance of getting caught by any type of law enforcement official is nonexistent.

What to eat before having good sex

Making love can be spontaneous or premeditated. If you think you want an 8-hour non-stop mind-blowing sex, you have to set the mood and the ambience, and prepare physically. You have to create a mental picture of how you would like it to be. Part of preparing the scene is eating the right food (that serves as aphrodisiacs) to physically equip you for the battle. But of course, an aphrodisiac is not enough to have the greatest performance of your life.

An aphrodisiac is anything that stimulates sexual arousal. It can be psycho-physiological (meaning through what you see, small, taste, or hear), or can be systemic (through something that affects you internally, like food, alcohol, potions, and medication).

Here are some foods that may help you obtain sexual excitement, stamina, and lustful sex.

Avocado: The Aztecs called the avocado tree a "testicle tree." The ancients thought the fruit hanging in pairs on the tree look like a man's testicles. What an imagination!

Carrots: This vitamin- and beta carotene-rich vegetable is believed to be a stimulant for males. However, it’ll be sexier if you’ll have carrot cake instead of a kernel carrot because your boyfriend might associate you with Looney Tunes.

Bananas: A myth says that after Adam and Eve succumbed to the “Apple,” they covered their nudity with banana leaves. But seriously, bananas are rich in potassium and B vitamins, which are necessities for sex hormone production.

Chocolate: This is the "nourishment of the Gods." Chocolates contain anti-oxidants, and when combined with red wine, they can have an intense passionate effect. Have you heard of chocolate body tattoo? It‘s a tattoo that you can stencil on your partner’s body and lick it afterwards. Tongue-bath!


Coffee: Caffeine is a stimulant but too much of it makes a depressant. Serve small amounts of rich dark coffee in sexy demitasse. Coffee stimulates both the body and the mind so you can last all night long.

Garlic: This is not a mere protection from vampires when you are doing it outdoors. The heat of garlic will bring your sexual desires to the surface. Have pizza or pasta with a light garlicky sauce, and you’re sure something nasty will happen in the bedroom later.

Honey: Many medicines in Egyptian times had honey as their base. These medicines included cures for sterility and impotence. Some seducers ferment drink from honey. Lovers on their “honeymoon” drank honey to sweeten love-making.


Wine: A glass or two of wine can greatly enhance romance. Wine relaxes and helps stimulate our senses. Drinking wine can be an erotic experience. Let your senses be seduced with the wine’s color. Caress the glass to evoke that you are ready for intimacy. A moderate amount of wine will arouse you; however, too much of it will make you drowsy and consequently perform lousily.

Oysters: Oysters were documented as an aphrodisiac during medieval times. It was said that women become uninhibited, unrestrained, and bendy after ingesting wine and eating oysters. An additional hypothesis is oyster resembles the "female" genitals. In reality oysters, are very nutritious and high in protein.


Pineapple: Rich in Vitamin C, pineapples are used in the treatment for impotence. Add it to a sweet rum drink for a tasty prelude to an evening of passion.

Put more variety in the bedroom

Have you been doing it for quite some time with your long-time boyfriend or husband—and still doing missionary?

Here are a few moves you can try if you want to bring a little more excitement and variety to your lust life..


1. Joystick Ride – Your man lies down flat on the bed or floor on his back. Straddle him and slide your legs to the sides of his chest. Hold on to his shins for leverage and start swiveling your hips in figure-of-eight motions.

2. The G-Force – Lie on your back and pull your knees toward your chest. He clasps your feet and thrusts from a kneeling position.

3. On the Edge – He leans back against a stack of pillows. Kneel astride his hips and lower yourself onto him.

4. Canine Coupling – Get down on all fours on the edge of a bed and let your man enter you from behind to do this special version of doggy style.

5. The Sidestroke – Lie on your right side, placing your weight on your hip and shoulder, and support your head with your hand. Stretch out your left leg and bring it closer to yourself.

6. Sensual Spoon – Lie on your side with your man behind you. Lift your top leg and he shifts his lower body into a half-kneeling position, entering you from behind. Feel the intimacy of lying side by side.

7. The Shower Shag – Stand facing the shower wall, with your legs slightly spread. Place your hands above on the wall. Your man holds on your waist and enters you from behind. Warning: Showers are very slippery, so be careful that neither of you slips!

Why don't I get turned on?

It is a common fact that more than 50 percent of women cannot achieve orgasm for varied reasons. We need to qualify this. Is it really inhibited orgasm, wherein there is delay or absence of orgasm following a normal sexual excitement—meaning you are excited, sex is intense, and you are wet but failed to reach the finish line? Or, is it a case wherein you can’t even attain or maintain the lubrication-swelling phase, meaning you can’t even be aroused? The former is called anorgasmia while the latter is a form of sexual arousal disorder.

When we talk of anorgasmia, it is more of fear of letting go and exploding. This may be due to guilt following a pleasurable experience, or the fear of abandoning oneself to a pleasurable situation. On the other hand, arousal disorder for most cases is due to the de-synchronization of will and motivation. For example, in a perfect world, you would love to submit to your husband’s desire, but you are not fully interested in coitus because you’re bored, stressed, or you have lack of interest. As a result, the sexual apparatus fails to lubricate despite adequate sexual stimulation. The worst scenario is, your partner continues to touch you and completed his sexual activity, yet there you are still very dry. Just imagine how painful that is for your vagina and psyche.

If this happens, this needs to be addressed immediately before it affects the relationship. Never ever continue intercourse if you have sexual apathy. It is not good for the relationship and for the body. The solution should be directed to the root cause. You have to talk and exert effort in removing or alleviating the underlying issues like marital conflict, professional jealousy, boredom, and issues of infidelity, among others. And when you talk, it should be done with genuine love. Both parties should be tactful and sensitive.

If there are no physical aberrations, you can do non-genital pleasuring first, like do ordinary things that are non-sexual but still please you and your partner. Shopping for shoes, buying your partner’s favorite food or washing his car can count as such activities. Then when the mood is set, do genital pleasuring until you get wet and fully lubricated. Hopefully it leads to a love consummation.

Boost your SEX confidence

Just as with getting a promotion or carrying off an extremely trendy, out-of-the-ordinary outfit, you can also become the good partner you want to be in the bedroom through a good amount of self-confidence.

Sex is not really just about the skill, but the intensity and confidence by which we perform the act, and how much of ourselves we put into it.

tips:

1. Show a little enthusiasm. Enjoy what feels good without reservation, and show your partner how excited you are by engaging him with your speech and movements.

2. Speak up! Communicate what you like to your partner: tell him what he does that you like best, the spot you want him to touch or something new that you would like to try.

3. Love your thighs! Stop complaining about its many flaws, and know that no matter what, he loves it when your legs are wrapped around him.

4. Know yourself. Figure out what moves work for you by touching your own body. This is the only way you can communicate it perfectly to your man.

5. Get a new bedtime script. Get comfy with the pillow talk by writing down some sexy thoughts and reading them out loud alone a few times. In bed, start small by giving him a play-by-play of the action or asking him if he likes what you’re doing to him.

6. Get a little uncomfortable. A lot of women would usually sacrifice comfort over style, and this also extends to your bedroom attire. We don’t mean you go all-out in porn star regalia, but wearing a thong under your jeans when you meet him will be a delightful surprise.

7. Fantasize! Don't judge the desires of your partner or take offense at what turns him on. As long as the boundaries of your relationship are maintained, fantasizing is a healthy aspect of sexuality.

8. Get creative with the merchandise! Always try to find out what works and what doesn’t for your man by touching him and doing new things to different parts of his body each time.

9. Be a little selfish. Self-maintenance is a high priority. Do something that makes you feel and look good regularly. Feeling like you're worth the splurge will not only boost your confidence, it will make you glow.

10. Stop doing favors. Do things you know your partner will enjoy, while asking for what he wants in return. Find out what your partner likes, and as long as you are comfortable with it, give it to him generously. The only "requirement" you should have is that he reciprocate on the same level.

WHY WOMEN ARE THE STRONGER SEX?

some reasons why you should be proud to be a woman:

Sexual. While men can cum once and then need to rest, women can go all the way. The penis gets soft (tumescence) after one ejaculation. On the other hand, women can have multiple orgasms. After one blissful episode, the penis shrinks while the vagina dilates, expands, and is ready to have more. Since sex is power, females are very powerful. The pleasure that they can give men is immeasurable.

Emotional. Though women have mood swings, it is a fact that females can adjust better during crisis or painful situations. Women tend to be more pliable and can withstand stressful events, that’s why women have less problems with drinking than men. As a result, men are more prone throughout most of their lives to high blood pressure. Moreover, less occurrence of cardiovascular disease in women may be linked to the female hormone, estrogen, which is produced mostly by the ovaries and protects the blood and heart from diseases.


Egg cell. Every ejaculation, there are millions of sperms released, swimming fast, competing to triumphantly be the first one to reach the egg. For the female egg, it is different: The other eggs will atrophy and give way to one egg. Thus, the sole egg will get its proper nourishment, and better viability. The egg cares and submits itself for better offspring.

Greatest pain. Only a woman can handle the greatest pain in life: giving birth. Females have a higher threshold for pain, and giving life is the highest sacrifice that a person can do. Women can produce something inside their bodies and let it out breathing and kicking. It’s a big wonder. Many scientists tried to inoculate human life but failed, while women have been producing life for ages.

Genesis. God created man according to His likeness. So He pulled some clay and created a Man. So technically, man came from soil. Then the Supreme Being created a woman, not coming from soil, but from human tissue. So by origin, females are like upgrades.


* Some will say guys need women more than they need them. Women can take care of themselves whereas men can't...